Happy Halloween!

Ah, it's that special time of the year again. The one night where guys get to dress like idiots, girls get to dress like sluts, and everybody gets wasted, free of judgment. So put on something stupid, get out and enjoy this special day, just like the Founding Fathers had intended.

Here's a classic package that I shot last year, back when I was a lowly rookie in market 120, wishing that I could be anywhere else. This turned out to be one of those really fun stories, where the reporter has to sit in the van while you run around and enjoy yourself. Thus, I present to you the Lone Pines Haunted Corn Maze!

Bridge School Benefit

On Saturday, I traveled down to the Shoreline Amphitheater in Mountain View to hit up the 21st Annual Bridge School Benefit concert. It's an all-acoustic show that Neil Young puts on every year to raise money for his wife's school for autistic children. The awesome thing about these concerts is that Neil Young gathers a variety of big names that you'd never see together anywhere else. In addition to Neil Young, this year's lineup included Metallica, Tom Waits, Jerry Lee Lewis, John Mayer and a handfull of others. It was an excellent 7 1/2 hours, fueled by an abundance of $8 beers. Here's a closer look at some of the finer acts-

Metallica

For my money, there's no better live band out there. I've been a fan of these guys since I was in middle school and have seen them several times. The majority of their acoustic set was made up of covers that they'd never played before, including Garbage's "Only Happy When it Rains" and Nazereth's "Please Don't Judas Me". Awesome.

Here's the acoustic version of their old school classic "Disposable Heroes":

Also, check out their cover of Dire Straits' "Brothers in Arms" here.

Neil Young

My dad was a big fan of Neil Young and, as a result, I grew up listening to his music. He mostly played songs from his new album, several of which turned into extended jams. He sounded great and played a fine set. I was also impressed by the fact that he billed himself third, below Metallica and Jerry Lee Lewis. If this had been my concert, I would have been the big finale. Guess that's why nobody buys tickets to my shows. Also, I can't play guitar, so that probably doesn't help either.

Here's a clip of "Spirit Road":

Good stuff.

Tom Waits

Tom Waits was awesome. His gravely voice and uniquely moody music sounded amazing live as he shook his hands and stomped his feet in a manner that, if attempted by anyone else, would look ridiculous. I hear that he rarely gives live performances, which is a shame, because I'd love to see him again. James Hetfield came out to introduce him before his set began, saying that he's a "personal favorite and one of the most original musicians out there". The audience welcomed him with a standing ovation, and he certainly didn't disappoint.

Here's a portion of his set, a song called "Little Drop of Poison":

Excellent.

Jerry Lee Lewis

That's right, the "Great Balls of Fire" guy is still alive and rockin. While the 72 year old doesn't quite "boogie woogie" like he used to, he played a mean set of classics. He sounded pretty good, but whenever they showed him on the screen, nothing was moving but his mouth and his fingertips on the piano keys. Not even a Ray Charles-style sway. However, that didn't deter the audience from dancing. In fact, his songs probably got a bigger reaction than any of the other acts.

Here's a portion of "Great Balls of Fire":

Good to see he's still going.

John Mayer

Am I a fan? Not really, but as far as acoustic guitar rock goes, he isn't bad. He played some good tunes, sounded just fine, and closed the set with an excellent rendition of "Free Fallin". I enjoyed his performance, although he's no Jerry Lee Lewis.

Here's his classic, "Waiting on the World to Change":

A fine addition to the lineup.

My Morning Jacket

Originally, Eddie Vedder and Flea were supposed to play together, but they canceled a few days before the show. I was really disappointed, as I was excited to see the two of them, especially playing together. As a last minute replacement, these guys were tossed into the mix. They played some fine acoustic rock, but damnit, they were no Eddie and Flea. Not exactly an equal trade, but hey, guess I can't complain.

Also at the show were Tegan & Sara and Regina Spektor. Not my cup of tea, but they were just fine anyway. Overall, it was an awesome evening of laid-back acoustic rock. I'll definitely make an effort to hit up these shows in the future.

Oh, and another highlight from the night was my brother Matt's new pal, a trashed, aging hippie who knew everything about every song, and was sure to let us know about it. At one point, he put his arm around Matt and said "Boy, I'm sure glad I got to sit next to you". He then pulled out a pipe and started partaking in illegal doings.

What a guy. And what a show.

Sac'mento 911

One of my favorite types of story to cover is the classic ride-along. I've done ride-alongs with state police, local police, the Air Force, even one of those trucks that spreads sand on icy roads. I just have fun tagging along while other people do their crazy jobs that I'd otherwise never be able to see firsthand.

Tonight I got to roll with the Sacramento Sheriff's department as they did a round-up of parole violators in Rancho Cordova. This multi-day sweep was festively titled "Octoberfest". However, this Octoberfest was quite a bit different from those I'd attended in the past. Also, I'd like to point out at this juncture that Sacramento's Sheriff's Department isn't nearly as hilarious as Reno's Sheriffs Department.



That aside, it was still a fine adventure. For the most part, the perps were compliant and weren't looking to start any trouble, which is certainly a good thing, but a good ol' Dog the Bounty Hunter-style beat down would have been nice. Still, I can't complain. There were a few doors kicked in, and one dope seller bolted out the back door, only to be tackled and handcuffed. Of course, since it was out the back door, it wasn't caught on tape. But I bet it looked awesome.



During this portion of the roundup, a couple of guys drove into the motel's parking lot, and upon seeing the cops, slammed on the breaks and tried to turn around. One of the deputies went over to investigate, and found that they were cruising along with a couple of fresh tall-boys in the cup holders. The passenger insisted that they both belonged to him, as if that made things better.

They also had a large steak knife next to the driver's seat, along with a couple of outstanding warrants. Clearly, today wasn't the best day for them to drop by the local cesspool.

At the end of the day, around 25 people were taken into custody, making the streets just a little safer... at least for tonight. Just gotta clear up some room in those overcrowded prisons. C'mon Arnold, wasn't the plan to start exporting them to other states?

When I got home, I was inspired to dig up a package that I shot in my younger days, where I did a DUI patrol ride-along with the Eugene Police right before Christmas. In addition to a high-speed chase that traveled down bike paths along the Willamette river, we came across a guy who drank a fifth of whiskey, got in a fight with his pals, and drove away... only to turn around and come back, as the score was yet to be settled (his buddy slept with his girlfriend... ooh!). When we arrived to the call, we found the guy's car parked on a lawn and blood streaming from his busted nose. After extensive sobriety tests, he was arrested for DUI, which he didn't actually realize until we got back to the station, at which point he began weeping uncontrollably. While much of the juicy details weren't included in the story, here it is for your viewing pleasure...

California's Burning

There are those who watch the news, and then there are those who watch the "news". Watching your local news, a national evening news or a news magazine-style show counts as watching the news. Watching Nancy Grace, Bill O'Reilly and/or Glen Beck does not count as watching news. In case you're one of the "news" viewers, here's what's going on in the real world: California's on fire, and it ain't lookin' good.

Since I'm located in Sacramento, we haven't been handling any fire coverage first-hand, but that doesn't mean that there aren't stories for us to cover. Being the hub of the fifth largest economy in the world, Sacramento gets some action every now and again. Tonight, I headed over to the Governor's Office of Emergency Services, the command center for the firefighting effort.

At first I was impressed with the setup. It made me think of the command center in 24 or, for those of you who aren't "hip to the beat", perhaps some sort of NASA command center.

However, upon closer inspection, I began to wonder how much all this fancy equipment was really being put to use. For a command center, I would have expected to see big screens with maps and tactical blueprints. Instead, they were watching the World Series...

...and getting updated on all the important "news" going on in the country...

Bill O'Reilly and Dennis Miller. Really, is there anyone else's opinion that'd matter in this situation? None that I'd want to hear from.

I'm not second guessing their effort or effectiveness with this disaster, but c'mon guys... media's here, time to look busy. I'm trying to make you guys look like heroes, the least you could do is hide that Cheeto bag that's spilled on your keyboard.

In all seriousness though, I know a number of people who have been evacuated, and that's scary stuff. When I was a kid I had to evacuate for the Oakland Hills fire, and having to assume that you might not see your house or belongings again is a very hard situation to be in. Hopefully all this comes to an end soon.

Step 1? Turn off Bill O'Reilly. Will it help put out the fires? Probably not, but it certainly couldn't hurt.

The Great Pumpkin

As Halloween approaches once again, magic can be felt in the air. It's unmistakable: the crisp leaves on the ground, the anticipation for hoards of candy, and the unrelenting hope that this year we might catch a glimpse of The Great Pumpkin.

Every year, people gather in pumpkin patches, on doorsteps and in news operation managers' offices, eagerly awaiting an appearance from the mythical Great Pumpkin. This year, those of us at our TV station were granted a visit, and much earlier than usual.

What a treat! But the craziest part was that it bared an uncanny resemblance to our news operations manager, the self-proclaimed "El Guapo"...

Have you ever noticed that Guapo and The Great Pumpkin have never been seen together in the same place at the same time? How strange...

Jesus Folk & Hobos

The past week or so has been pretty slow around Sacramento. It's been hard to find anything worthy of praise or mockery, so I started going through my archives looking for some good journalism-related entertainment to share with you, the faithful Photocalypse subscriber.

Here's a classic moment from my early days in Eugene, which began as one of those stories that probably wasn't going to be anything but turned out to be something magical.

So the newsroom got a call one evening from a jolly fellow named Jebediah. He and his religious group were protesting a pornography store, as they felt that pornography was tearing apart families and their values. Being the only nightside photog, my dinner break was abruptly interrupted so that I could make it downtown for this "story". My Taco Bell gorditas and Simpsons reruns would have to wait.

So I arrived at ye olde pornography shoppe to find 15 or so protesters. Ok, I said, at least something is going on, so it might be a story after all. As I grab my gear, a homeless gentleman (perhaps a hobo, although those reports are unconfirmed) passed by me, pushing an empty wheelchair. A strange sight, although not an uncommon one around Eugene, so I thought nothing of it.

As I'm asking around to see who's in charge of this holy brigade, I noticed that ol' Patches had climbed into his wheelchair and wheeled himself out into traffic, flailing his arms and legs as he shouted wild proclamations. Between him and the wacky Jesus crew, it made for quite a sight...

Fortunately they were there to pray for his safety, because he made it out of the predicament unharmed, and clearly those cars weren't about to be bothered with slowing down.

Sometimes I miss the ridiculous things that you come across working in a top 125 market.

Upon my return, my gordita was cold and the ice in my soda had melted and transformed what once was Orange Fanta into a watery imitation. A highly unsatisfying meal.

WMDs, Car Accidents and Cal

Today I came in early for a pretty sweet assignment. The National Guard was running a day of WMD disaster training on a local military base. They had a miniature town built in a warehouse, which they filled with 70 volunteer victims, complete with graphic makeup-enhanced injuries. In this scenario, a truck containing a deadly virus ran into a building that housed military families. Casualties were abound.

Decked out in haz-mat suits, the soldiers went through the building, examining the various wounded civilians and safely removing them from the building. They were extradited to a colony of tents...

...where they were decontaminated and operated upon.

It was awesome. The make-up, the smoke, the dramatic enactments... it was a photog's dream. The station asked me to shoot a nat-pack if it was anything cool. Since it was cool, I shot the hell out of it. I got interviews with the commander of the region's National Guard, with soldiers, with victims. I got sound from rescuers. I got sound from victims in agony. I got nats here, I got nats there. It was gonna be my finest work.

After being on site for four hours, they tell me... "We'll make it a vo-sot (AKA an "honorable mention"), go to this car accident instead." Actually the story was dropped from the show completely.

It's tough being an artist in a newsman's world.

That aside, it was still a pretty cool experience. After being heavily addicted to numerous seasons of 24, it's always cool to see that stuff going down in real life... or at least training for it. When a virus broke out in season 3, people were shot to keep them from leaving the contaminated area. That didn't happen today... but it could have.

So my day of 24-related adventures came to an end without the Emmy-material nat-pack. However, after tonight's transpirings, I just can't stay disappointed...

That's the first (and probably the last) time I've ever supported the Beavers. Stupid Cal don't feel so good now, do they?

Go Ducks.

The Rocky Road Underground Trailer

Over the past several months, I have been slowly piecing together a short documentary on a fictional band, The Rocky Road Underground. For those who haven't bared witness to The RRU's awesomeness, you can see a brief synopsis on their creation here. Is it going to be any good? That is certainly up for debate, but it's gotten a few chuckles out of me, which is all I really set out to do.

While the film is only about 62% done, an advanced copy of the film's trailer has leaked onto the internet, so you might as well check it out here:

Also take a listen to some of their masterpiece songs at their MySpace page.

Modesto Elvis

While in Modesto for a story this evening, I came across a strange occurrence.

We were eating dinner at an A&W restaurant, when I noticed the sound of live music coming from the parking lot. Upon closer inspection, I found that there was a flatbed truck supplying a stage for a makeshift concert. Odd, especially because that wasn't there when we drove up, but what's even odder was that Elvis was the one preforming. And you want to know what's the oddest part of all? People were enjoying it!

While we were leaving, I snapped a picture of one of the Elvises (there were 3, and I think one was Asian):

And, as everybody knows, chicks dig Elvis, and our reporter Melissa was no exception:

If this had occurred anywhere except Modesto, I would have been confused and slightly frightened, but when you're in Modesto, it just seems right.

Sorry folks, Modesto Elvis has left the flatbed.

REMbug

A few months back, local corporate yes-man Kurt "El Guapo" Richter shot a short film reenacting a nightmare he had years ago. Today marked the world internet premiere of this film, as well as my motion picture acting debut. Finally that college acting class is paying off.

So take a few minutes out of your otherwise boring life and enjoy REMbug, it's quality stuff.

The Ransom

The following is a true story. Well, some of it kind of is.

A few weeks ago, a local television reporter's beloved makeup kit mysteriously went missing. After a massive manhunt, the search and rescue effort was called off, as the reporter was left to cope with the fact that her makeup kit may never be seen again.

Despite what officials told her, the reporter never gave up hope. She still had faith in her heart that one day they would be reunited.

Earlier this evening, as the reporter went about her nightly duties, she was shocked to receive the following email:

I understand you've been looking for this for quite sometime. I also understand that it is quite valuable to you. I can assure you that your make-up is alive and well. How much longer it stays that way is entirely up to you. Follow my instructions to a tee, and your make-up will be returned to you unharmed. If you do not comply, the make-up dies. If you contact the police, the make-up dies. If you contact the media, the make-up dies. Are we clear?

Here are my demands:

1: Track down the Mark Demsky guitar photo, and hang it up in the sports department.

2: Implement the phrase "the sky is falling" into your next news story.

Upon completion of these two tasks, you will be given a third and final task to complete. Upon completion of the third task, your make-up will be returned unharmed. I need not remind you that you are being watched. Stray from our orders, the make-up dies.

Cordially,

The Rocky Road Underground Faction

The reporter was overwhelmed with emotion as she read this. While her sweet little makeup kit was clearly alive, it might not be for long. Fearing for its life, she immediately reached for the phone to call the authorities. Then she froze, realizing that doing so could put the makeup kit in danger. So what was she to do? It had been the longtime stance of the news department not to give in to terrorist demands, so she had to work around the threats of the email.

Figuring that she could outsmart the wily masterminds, she went in search of a wise engineer who would be able to trace the email back to its source. Despite his best efforts, the engineer was unable to identify the proprietor of the message. Clearly they were dealing with diabolical geniuses.

Over the next half hour, she sat at her desk contemplating her next move, when another email appeared in her inbox. Her hand shook as it reached for the mouse and clicked it open. To her horror, she found the following:

You were warned about contacting the media. No more funny stuff.

Consider this your final warning.

-The Rocky Road Underground Faction

It contained a photograph of the friendly engineer who had come to help her less than an hour ago. She didn't think that they would consider him a member of the media. In a panic, her eyes scanned the room, disparately looking for someone who could help. However, if she were to speak a word of this to any of them, they could be next.

She looked again at the first email, deciding that she would have to break protocol and give into the demands. But there was a problem... Her story for the day had fallen through. She wasn't going to be able to go on the air tonight and say the designated line. Looking up at the clock, she realized that she had just missed the end of the newscast. She had failed one of the directives.

The reporter slowly returned to her desk, where she found one final email awaiting. With a tear in her eye, she clicked it open:

You have tested our patience long enough. You have failed to comply with our demands.

You brought this upon yourself. You can find the corpse of your beloved in the locker next to [NAME REMOVED].

Better luck next time.

-The Rocky Road Underground Faction

It was over, and she had lost. Despite her best efforts, her makeup kit was gone forever. A diligent manager just happened to be walking by, so she asked him to come with her to the locker, as she was unsure if she would be able to handle the sight of what might lie within it.

Fortunately, she had purchased a new makeup kit the week before, so no harm was done.

The members of The Rocky Road Undreground Faction were never identified.

And just to clarify, the pictures and emails are real. Her reactions weren't quite as desirable as we had hoped, so I spiced them up a bit, but the rest is true.