The recent departure of a local TV station's chief photographer has sparked a heated battle over who is to replace the legendary Kurt "Special Sauce" Richter. As of press time, the decision has been narrowed down to four finalists. Given that each is a talented and respected individual, it is going to be a tough decision. Thus I present to you... The Competitors for Chief Photog '06!
Competitor Number 1: Beta Tape
Beta Tape has been working for the station for some time now. He is well known around the newsroom for his first-hand familiarity with Beta decks, cameras and tapes. He has been proven to come through in tricky situations and is dedicated to producing top-quality shows. He is a world traveler, having been to Chile, Tahoe and Burning Man in only the past year. However, it is no secret that he is a bit of an alcoholic and has been caught berating interns and production personel on a regular basis.
Competitor Number 2: Yoda
By far the senior member of the staff, Yoda has been working at the station for longer than most employees have been alive. He brings with him experience in this business and an understanding of television news and its impact on the audience. Organized and wise beyond his years, Yoda has proven himself to be a talented and reliable member of the news staff. Unfortunatly, Yoda is also a union member and would have to be paid a union wage (AKA a livable wage).
Competitor Number 3: BabyBear
Frank "BabyBear" Malone is the youngest member of the news staff. A smart and talented individual, BabyBear shows a lot of promise to become a leading photographer in the market. Despite a rough childhood and a past that has included habitual drug, alcohol and gambling addictions, BabyBear has managed to fight the odds and become a contributing member of society. He shows a passion for the television news business and is determined to become a star. However, he has been reprimanded several times for his behavior around the female employees and once for urinating on an office chair and blaming it on a child.
Competitor Number 4: Lil' Richter
The offspring of a former chief photographer, Lil' Richter takes on many of his father's traits. Despite Richter Senior's denial of his relationship to this candidate, the resemblance is undeniable. Productive, talented and short tempered, Lil' Richter has proven to be the driving force behind the news team since his father left. He arrived mysteriously in a basket under the desk of former editor Jed Smith the day after Smith's unfortunate departure, and has taken control of production operations ever since. Brazen and immature, Lil' Richter can be a handfull to deal with, but at the end of the day he gets the job done.
So there you have it, the four candidates to fill the Chief Photographer position. Feel free to contribute input on who should move up in the ranks and become the powerhouse leader behind the news photogs!
While it is unfortunate that we lose such an important element to our operation, we must continue to look towards the future. Earlier today, Tapie's replacement was introduced to the newsroom. Please allow me to introduce his non-union Mexican equivalent...
Alfonzo Beta, the second cousin of Tapie, was hired earlier today. We are excited to have him as a part of our team and look forward to working with him in the future! Here we see the new chief photographer, Union Yoda, saying goodbye to Tapie as he welcomes Alfonzo to the team.
Tapie and Alfonzo enjoyed a day together as Alfonzo was trained in all the duties that Tapie formally held.
Alfonzo and Tapie, we wish you both the best of luck!!
