Floater Life

For the past several weeks, I managed to go without drawing the short straw at work. However, that string of luck came to a halt today, as I was elected to be the floater.

Now, for those of you who aren't "hip to the beat", the floater is essentially the assignment desk's bitch. Anything that comes up throughout the day - press conferences, grass fires, cat fashion shows - you're sent out to get. Some days, this means you get to kick back and spend your shift watching Perfect Strangers reruns. Others, it means that you don't stop moving until several hours after your shift ends. How did today go for me? Let's just say I didn't get to enjoy any of Balki's hilariously charming antics.

Today's adventure began with... BOOP...BOOP...BOOP (That's the Price is Right wheel sound, just to clarify)... HOUSE FIRE!

Welcome to Rancho Murieta, a lovely private community about 20 miles East of Sacramento. With only one guarded gate in and out, these well-to-do folk are sure to avoid any of the riff-raff commoners you and I know as our neighbors and coworkers.

Well, a lovely house in this community mysteriously caught fire in the middle of the night. House damaged, people safe, end of story.

What have we got next? Survey says... FOOTBALL!

UC Davis recently built a new football stadium on their campus. Now, this "stadium" is no Autzen. Hell, it doesn't even match up to Cal's Memorial Stadium (What are you memorializing? Your dignity?). However, it is still a fine little complex, complete with a restroom and two concession stands. Sweet.

The game, which was actually a scrimmage with the team playing against itself, consisted primarily of fumbles and the occasional field goal. The story? People like stadium, people like football. Moving along.

Our Davis fun didn't end with the game. What's a trip out of town without... WEATHER!

Every night our weathrcaster plays a little video of something weather-related that took place somewhere in our market. Kids playing in a pool, for example, is gold.

College campuses are usually a decent supplier of weather video, so I decided to drop in on the UC campus while I was in the area. Usually, there are people studying, eating, lying out in the sun, etc. Saturdays in August, however, don't make for the most bustling collegiate experience. The campus was pretty dead, but I grabbed what I could before I was pulled away for BrEaKiNg NeWs!

Today's police scanner story has provided us with a... FOREST FIRE!

This little slugger was brought to us by the town of Arnold. Now I know what you're thinking... "Who's Arnold?" That's what I thought, because why would anyone name their town, let alone their kid, Arnold? Well that remains a mystery for another day, but I do know this... Arnold is a long-ass distance away. Drive to Stockton, which is far away enough as is, then head East for another 70 miles or so, and you'll almost be to the town of Arnold.

In addition to the massive distance, there was another little detail to this story that I bet you didn't see coming. As a result of the fire, the nearby highway had to be shut down. Q: What's the hardest part about shooting a story that takes place on a closed highway? A: The goddamn highway is closed.

Now, being a member of the news media, police will let me past their barriers into otherwise unaccessible areas. The only catch is that I have to get to the police barrier in order to sweet-talk my way in. This can be difficult when the road is full of a bunch of jackasses who are sitting in their cars saying to themselves "Hey, the freeway is closed. Rather than turn around, I'm going to sit in my car and wait like a goddamn dipshit". Or so I assume, because it took me over 3 hours to get to this damn fire.

By the time I got there, the fire was out and the remains weren't much to look at. I had to shoot the story quickly, as I still had a mighty journey back to civilization, as well as an approaching deadline.

Thus concludes my day as the floater. Now, out of curiosity, I reset the odometer in the car at the beginning of the day in order to see how much driving I would actually do. I guessed it would be around 150 miles, which I figured was way over the top, and assumed that I'd have to drive around the block a few times to get anywhere near that. The result? Nearly double my prediction.

268.6 miles. To put that into perspective, that's almost as far as driving from Sacramento to Ashland, which is just past the Oregon border. That's a lot of driving. Hey, just another day at the office.